10 September 2014

WHAT DO YOU EAT ON FIRST DATES?

I don't often go on dates, or rather - I don't go on dates. For a simple reason - I am married. And since I got married pretty early, I hadn't had much of a dating experience prior to my marriage either. Unfortunately - or rather fortunately - I managed to avoid all the dating stress somehow, and I know it is stressful for a fact.

Everyone has a friend with never ending dating drama, including me. A friend of mine, let's call her Katya, has just started going out with a new man, and the amount of drama she is going through is truly depressing. She stresses over pretty much anything - what to wear, what to say, how to sit, what perfume to choose and other quite common emotions almost everyone experiences before heading to a date. However her recent cause of stress is what to eat on first dates, or for that matter, - what not to eat. As things are, first dates almost always take place in restaurants or other places where you get food. Food connects people.

Have you ever been on a strict diet due to health issues, for example, and noticed how hard it is to interact with people that unlike you can afford anything to eat? I have. It's terribly uncomfortable and awkward being unable to go to any restaurant you and your friends choose and enjoy yourself without making a ridiculous order that roughly sounds like "Salad with no tomatoes and no eggs, please, no topping as well and boiled chicken rather than fried, please, also no breading, and can you please make a three times boiled chicken with no salt or pepper and white rice for the second course, please, even though you don't have such in menu? Thank you so much...." We don't even notice what a huge role food plays not only as a primitive fuel for our body but as a socializing tool as well, until we get to the point where we can't eat properly in public.

Food connects people, and that's probably one of the reasons why first dates take place in restaurants and cafes. As much as the place your date chooses to invite you to can tell a lot about them, the food you order there can tell about you (we do not consider McDonald's do we?). Since I have already mentioned my lack of dating experience, it's only logical to assume that I have no experience in what food you should or should not order on a first date either.

However, Katya and I, by common efforts, tried to make our own list. So first of all we both agreed that it is more than preferably to avoid coming across as a calorie counting freak, thus going "I'll stick with the salad" is highly unlikely to guarantee you a pleasant evening. Are you going to chew on salad leaves for the whole evening? If this question isn't going to be voiced, it's absolutely going to be thought. Let's admit - first dates are not the best time to diet, is it? But if after all you absolutely can't afford eating something more substantial than grass, it's better to settle for a simple salad and grilled low fat fish and vegetables for second course. It's a solid dish, albeit low calorie. And it's not just salad.

Next in the list comes whether it is acceptable ordering something that is supposed to be consumed using your hands. Personally, I think it is only acceptable if you eat a burger like a princess. But princesses don't eat burgers - unless late at night, in old pyjamas and in front of TV - when no one can see their Fall. This never applies to dates. Trust me, no matter how many times I tried to eat a burger gracefully I pathetically failed. Didn't you? Well, unlike me, you probably didn't even try knowing beforehand what an ungrateful job it would have been. After all, if you necessarily want meat, order a steak. The only "hand food" it is worth ordering in the presence of your first-date date is lobster. It is not only terribly tasty, but equally sexy.

We both agreed on no soups on first dates. I mean - the spluring, the backsplash, making a fool of yourself... It's a dating disaster. Fact. And I am fairly certain it is unnecessary mentioning any meals with garlic, chopped greenery, spices, or anything that can lead to a handshake as a grand finale instead of a passionate kiss is to be avoided. Even I know this.

Katya and I eventually agreed that ideal meal for a first date would be:
sushi - however, please, don't fight with king-size warm crab rolls or anything that requires opening your mouth to the size where an entire dining table would fit. Experience shows tiny bite sized rolls can be very tasty too;
pasta (or ravioli) - I am going to reveal a secret here, eating pasta like a hoover screeching your fork against the plate and splattering it all over your shirt was invented by Americans and Night Princesses akin to those who eat burgers far away from witness eyes. A proper Italian pasta is to be eaten using both fork and spoon - as much as it fits in your mouth - no more no less. This way you will avoid spreading delicious tomato-basil sauce all over your endured outfit;
fish or meat steak - with or without side dish is always a win - not only for your body but for your image as well;
seafood - especially the lobster. It's law-fat and it's fun;
I'll have what they are having - Katya says she often goes for this one. It's not only safe, it shows your date you trust them, says she. If they are a freak ordering a burger on a first date, and you really really like them (and burgers), why should you not as well, after all? Never a bad start, is it?
chocolate desserts - need I say more?

These are amateur conclusions of two burger lovers, one of which has no experience in dating, and the other one that almost never goes past first date. Not sure if it's what with her attitude to dating as sports or the wrong first date food choices.

The list is obviously not complete, so what do you eat on first dates, ladies as well as gentlemen? And, for that matter, do not?
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26 comments

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  6. I don't get why it should matter what you eat at dinners on your first date, and yet, I get nervous eating on a first date. LOL. Great tips for anyone who get the nerves like I did. Pasta is my easy go to choice!

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  9. What a great post! I can totally relate. My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 and a half years and he was my first boyfriend. Since we were so young, we kind of avoided the whole "awkward dating". I have a friend who is like your friend. She worries about certain things that I'm so glad I didn't have to endure!

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  10. ok, that balloon picture is quite possibly the cutest thing I've ever seen! Loved this post and your style is rad! xo

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